December 11, 2024 at 20:19
ive been feeling terrible TERRIBLE. i already have journal entries detailing all of my miseries, at first i thought i was getting sick but then there was no full illness. next i thought it was a combination of low sleep/lack of exercise. honestly when we broke up it didnt really affect me much. im coming to think that a decent portion of my sadness comes from the separation. its like my breakup debt is due, i cant sit up straight i dont wanna leave my bed i cant focus on anything i just cry in small bursts throughout the day i feel so sad im crying as i chew my oatmeal right now and im so stressed because i have so much to do and i dont even wanna talk to you. the mere thought of it makes me anxious. i miss u so much then i remember things youve done and i get so angry and disgusted and then i just feel dead all day until i miss u again its terrible i hate it so much i just wanna go through hell to get my emotions out so i can finally move on...
December 6, 2024 at 14:07
faggot
December 6, 2024 at 13:13
i dont get u because when i had the saudi girl text u for me u told me it made u like me more but when i text ur friend suddenly youre turned off by my possesivenes and i know the main thing u didnt like was that i spilled the beans on our conflicts but I DONT KNOW u just seemed very dissapointed with me besides thefact. i texted technodharmic ... i dont think ill show u this website. ive been sort of making it with you potentially seeing it in mind but i think i need to go completely unfiltered.
i wanted to give u your space during the weekend so that youd have time to confront yourself but due to finals i think youll just be busy grinding? i think ill send u a sweet maintenance message and then continue keeping my distance,, its kind of strange anytime i think of actually talking to u my heart gets sour, i wonder if being friends is even a good idea. everything changes when i actually connect with you. i think i need to learn to trust myself more
kiss
December 6, 2024
your schools closed o.o i wonder if youre gonna go out with your friends or just idk theres probably online assignments and club stuff u also have to do. im kind of scared to talk to you, idk if youre gonna hang out with ugly. the urge is there for sure but at the same time i feel like maybe going a few weeks apart from you is the best strategy. why text you when im desperate?
farisfarisfarisfarisfaris
December 5, 2024
imgoinginsane when i talk to a male that i feel might be interested in me all i can hear in my head is just your name over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again GET OUTTT!!!!!!!!!!! i love you i miss you but i think we need this desperately for character development i hope u found the company you wanted
i want to text u so bad
December 5, 2024
its 11pm now im on the phone with my friend and hes telling me how its ok that i made this etcetc idk everyone acts like im not supposed to talk to you ever anymore but I WANT TO SO BAD. I think maybe wanting to and then still not doing it shows good dicipline... or is it just running away? either way looking at ur lastfm and it seems like youre okay. maybe this is the distance obsession you were worried abt, but why havent u texted?
awkward!(o_o)
December 5, 2024
Well ive been pretty busy and also emotionally recalibrating these past few days, i almost felt like i got over you but just as i was feeling free i suddenly get an urge to do this.. so whatever i guess i think its pretty funny,,,, IM STILL BUILDING IT. updates later,